“I am in charge of my own life. I take responsibility for filling my life with what nourishes my health and happiness.”--Jan Veltman

“The buck stops here” was a sign President Harry Truman kept on his desk while In the Oval Office. It meant that he accepted the responsibility for making the final decision.
No sending it further “up the line.” No blaming the outcome on someone else.
But when it comes to our life choices—how we behave, how we treat others as well as ourselves—we have become geniuses at “passing the buck.”
When we act in a way that is less than admirable, how often have we said “But he/she made me so mad I just couldn’t help myself!”
When we ignore another’s needs in favor of our own wants, we often justify our actions by saying someone else will do it: put the money in the Salvation Army kettle, give up the bus seat for an elderly person, cast a ballot on election day.
As for assuming responsibility for those acts that hurt no one but ourselves, once again we look for someone—anyone!—to blame for our decision to abuse alcohol or drugs, to be unfaithful to our partner, to choose self-indulgence over self-care.
Tempting as it can be to “pass the buck,” doing so calls to mind another famous quote, this one from the cartoon character Pogo: “We have met the enemy and he is us.”
Each day, we have two choices: be our own worst adversary or be our greatest ally.
It’s all about making choices and accepting the responsibility for the outcome of those choices. If we are willing to do this, we will act in a more nurturing, loving and respectful way—to ourselves and to the people in our lives.

“We won't have a society if we destroy the environment.” Margaret Mead

It’s not just ourselves and those people in our lives who need to be nurtured. The environment itself is in desperate need of love and attention, commitment to its well-being and sacrifices to promote its health.
We talk a good game and maybe even make a few "green" changes—switching to CFLs or using a cloth bag instead of plastic—but all too often, the changes are those that don’t really cost us much in terms of time, energy or discomfort level.
But when it comes to making bigger alterations—walking instead of driving, spending a little more for eco-friendly items or even switching off our lights for 60 minutes to celebrate Earth Hour—we decide that it’s too hard. Too impractical. Not really going to make a difference.
"Let the other ‘greenies’ do it," we say to ourselves, as though they are the only ones who are part of the environment.
The fact is, we all live here on earth and we all bear responsibility for its future. And while each act makes a difference, if we truly want to nurture this planet, we must be willing to be a little uncomfortable, forgo a few small indulgences and increase our awareness of how we impact this globe.
Love the planet and it will love you back!

“Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.”—Lucille Ball

Do you love yourself—really and truly?
Or do you take yourself for granted, treating your own needs with less care and attention than you give to everyone else’s?
Loving yourself isn’t about being selfish, inconsiderate or ego-focused. When you truly love yourself, you nurture those aspects that are the best part of you—your gifts and abilities, your traits and standards—and make a committed effort to overcoming those habits and tendencies that cause harm to others or to yourself.
When you love yourself, you are acknowledging your worth and value, and then acting in a way that shows who you are and what you stand for.
And when someone in your life treats you in a way that conflicts with your self-estimation—he or she is abusive or mean or just plain hurtful—you put a safe distance between the two of you because you do love yourself.
Take some time to identify what qualities you possess that makes you “love-worthy.” Write them down, post them where you can see them every day and then tell yourself “I love you” each time the list catches your eye.
After all, if you don’t love yourself, how can you expect anyone else to love you?

The only way to have a friend is to be one.”—Ralph Waldo Emerson

We know how important friends are. They rank right up there with family—always ready to help out, to offer encourage and support, in short, to be what you want when you want it.
But too often we judge our friends by what they do for us, instead of looking at what we have done for them. Like little children, we stretch out our hands for them to fill, instead of reaching out to give to them. Or worse, we keep a figurative balance sheet, and withhold our friendship when we think the accounts are out of balance.
True friendship is such a rarity that it must be treasured. And while it can be resilient, it is not indestructible.
Nurture your friendships—call your friends today and let them know how much having them in your life means to you.
Demonstrate with the gift of your time and attention that they are valuable people—not for what they have done for you but just because they exist in this world.

“Smile at each other, make time for each other in your family.” Mother Teresa.

For me, May is a bittersweet month. While I have much to celebrate—two wonderful adult children and one terrific grandson—I long for the years when I would call my own mother to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day.
It’s been nearly four years since she died, and while I have come to terms with the loss, I have not forgotten the lesson losing someone dear taught me: don’t miss a minute.
It’s why I call my Dad almost every day—because I know that some day, he won’t be there to pick up the phone. It’s why I treasure the times with my kids and grandson, because life isn’t fair and bad things can happen without warning.
Robert Frost wrote that “Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in”—but they don’t have to love you. So if they do, treasure that. Nurture your family relationships—never take them for granted. Tell them you love them. Be there for them.
Make time for them now—today.